The right thing / closure/ inner calling

Dedicated to everyone who are going thru rough patch. This post is the composite of 3 different story.. Hope something good come out of it.
Story 1 :
Part 1 : Anger / forgiveness ( his side of the story)

U have seen me at lowest point of my lyf.. Even sometimes when i cried.. Fighting with an incurable disease for most of my lyf, one thing that i have gained is patience.. People come and go but only few make u feel connected .. Ur opinion matters to me a lot so i couldn't imagine a world without u.. I use to believe we have strong tuning and nothing can further go wrong if my family and friends stood by my side..

Day u stopped talking to me, my world was shaken apart.. Coz all i was asking for is closure but u were not ready to talk.. I felt anguish followed by anger.. Never felt such angry from a long tym but even that phase passed away quickly.. I presumed that u may have ur reason for not talking to me so i gave u space.. Some dayz were gud and some other dayz i just wanted to talk to u..

It was Diwali eve and i called at ur home.. All i wanted was to hear from u.. I was ready to forget and forgive.. No explanation needed.. From that day onward our friendship has grown stronger then ever.. One thing i realized with tym is that, "when life throws lemons at u, u make lemonade and drink it"..  

Part 2 : Teenage mind (explanation by me after long tym)

Intricacies of teenage mind is very hard to understand.. Coz every thought we weave is the result of many different threads and selecting those threads was very complicated for me.. Things we feel are the outcome of millions of butterfly effect.. I'm not saying that we don't have control over our emotion but every action may not have proper justification.. How could u describe pain and agony.. Or how can justify feeling of loathing over sympathy.. We learn, we evolve.. We r not defined by just one single moment, rather we r defined our willingness to evolve into something better..

U think banishing people without giving them any explanation bares them from pain or complexity of any sort then ur absolutely wrong.. Decision to left someone hurting is harsh and immature.. Leaving you with millions of question made me realize that old me owes u some answers.. What a teenage mind thought that suffering makes u stronger but i forgot u were already suffering a lot.. I was no use to see u in that condition.. And i guess that made me angry.. Somewhere at some-point i felt i will loose you and that thought swayed me..

Every decision i took had immense effect on u but it affected me as well.. I thought i was doing the right thing but in time i have realized mistake of leaving u.. Maybe i have gained sense to see people more than their pity.. Also time heals everything so thanks for showing patience with me.. 

Story 2

Part 1: Hope (her side of story)

I abused ,i cried..
Did everything to make it alright..
Hopeless and relentless..
When I knocked million tyms..
Things went south..
Every tym i tried..
In order to please u..
Climbed every height..
Tell me o tell me..
Treason or a crime ?
What r u going thru..
Is it a mistake of mine..
What have i done ..
To hurt u so bad..
Ignoring , no talking..
Why r u mad ?
Where's that stranger ?
Who stood by my side..
Use to notice when i was sad..
Spending tym together..
The bond that i had..
Thinking about it makes me sad..
Pleased u and appeased u..
Now I'm giving u space..
Still Dying to talk..
But rejecting with grace..
Living a lyf..
World without you..
Ppl feel pity..
Not because of you..
U were, u are dear to me..
Alive in my memory..
Close to my heart..
U r pierced in me ..  

Part 2 : Maturity / Promise (grown into a better person)

Looking thru the window seeking escape..
I didn't know i was making a grave mistake..

Dealing with my demons, knowingly hurt u..
Brought a gr8 sorrow, had no courage to face u..

Digging an abyss, was looking for some space..
Deeper and darker, now even harder to escape..

Its not your fault, saying sorry wont do fixing..
My ego was growing , i was feeding on sobbing..

Dying to hear from u, cried when i use to be alone..
Cherished all d memories, missed u when u were gone..

Ur hope was power, brought positive impact on me..
Patience that u shown, has grown upon me..

One thing i realized time heals every injury..
Changed into better self, even you've lost fury..

An inner calling, promise to repeat never...
Our bond has grown stronger than ever..

Story 3 :

Part 1: influence ( thats what he felt)

He came into my lyf like a zephyr.. But set everything in motion.. Unbalanced & unfamiliar.. now i was drifting along with it.. Lost in the moments, building up something,  i forgot that i was the one fragile in it.. 

Maybe I was afraid of what i'll become..  It took only a moment to decide, when things went south.. Maybe i was worried only abt influence of ur.. Trying to become better, i made some choices that world will never understand.. Ignored the consequences and settled down.. 

I know i am throwing away time we spent together.. I never imagined blaming someone for what i felt will haunt me back.. Was it a wrong call ?? Am i wrong ?? Am i being selfish ?? Question i ask myself repeatedly.. Stopped listening to ppl long tym back.. Trying to move on.. 

Imagine a tiny force trying to push against strong one..  Maybe i gaveup on u too soon.. Maybe blaming it on u was one to deal with it.. Dealing with pressure of lyf and my own demons, there was no place for drama.. I chose simple, i chose me.. 

I can live with the fact that u r not part of my lyf anymore.. But i can't see u manipulating ur way back.. I have made my peace.. maybe when i'll grow strong someday and then i'll amend what i cant fix right now.. 

P.S. : dont wait for me & dont wanna talk abt it..

Part 2 : love / characterization ( his voice my words )

People dont like what they dont feel... And i feel why they dont like.. Opinion vary from person to person.. But things that connect us all is the feeling Of being left alone.. 

We live, we laugh, we fight, we talk, we evolve.. Thats how our bond grow stronger.. smtimes we underestimate the complexity of mind.. So dont let any thoughts & feeling unexpressed coz it could be the reason for blocking other person.. thing starts to go wrong when there is no talking becoz of self esteem or disgust for other person.. But if we lower our ego and make room for love in our life, we can find the silver lining.. 

Mistakes happens but its we who acknowledge them.. Ones mistake could be a crime for others.. I know somethings cannot be taken aback.. But there is gr8 power in guilt .. It could ruin sometimes and other tyms it could help in transformation.. 

I have seen ppl change.. And its our responsibility to help them in transition rather let them cross that line over and over.. I believe positive attitude and affection can bring mountains down.. 

Some ppl remains exclusive, some ppl makes many friends & some just change with tym.. Ppl don't take sides, and its not manipulation that leads to getting ppl attention.. Its even more tormenting for others to see u this way..

I know concept of fault in our stars or not having anything in common.. But things that bind us is the willingness to be Spark for that someone.. 

A proper apology require 3 steps..

1)Admission of wrong doing..

2)A promise never to repeat that action..

3)An earnest request for forgiveness..

-The Big Bang Theory

He has done everything to deserve ur forgiveness.. Beside all he still wishes to talk to u.. Life is short and we meet only few ppl who likes us unconditionally.. Its suffocating sometimes to be loved all the time but when hard tym hits only ppl like him stays ..

Let him slide..

Let him crawl..

He will rise above it all..

Give him time..

Give him spark..

He will stay for when its dark..

Loyal as family..

Close to ur heart..

Always and forever just like an art.. 

P.S. : i know when i see ppl testing ppl